Week 52: Sight

My Mom has been incredibly blessed with the gift of sight in most all forms of art, but especially when it comes to the art of poetry. I always receive the most beautiful pieces from her. Some, from well-known greats, and others from the most obscure, off-the-wall sources. And one of my favorite things happens to be finding the beauty within obscure, off-the-wall sources :) 

Apparently, God matched us well, mother and daughter :)

This Christmas, she sent a compilation by contemporary American poet, W.S. Merwin, called, The Rain in the Trees. I happened upon one of the most stirring, lovely pieces within this collection. The poem, Sight, perfectly sums up my own compilation of these past 52 weeks of life. I have often looked at my son and wondered if God sent him to me so that I would have sight. I wonder (because I cannot recall) if I had it before he came into my life. Did I see? How could I have? Because the moment that a mere fertilized mass of cells attached itself within in my uterus was the moment that I first saw. 

And in these 52 weeks, I have seen much light. Thank you to all of you who have shone so brightly for us on this journey. May your coming 52 weeks be blessed and inspired.

Sight
-W.S. Merwin

Once
a single cell
found that it was full of light
and for the first time there was seeing

when
I was a bird
I could see where the stars had turned
and I sent out on my journey

high
in the head of a mountain goat
I could see across a valley
under the shining trees something moving

deep 
in the green sea
I saw two sides of the water
and swam between them

I 
look at you
in the first light of the morning
for as long as I can     

Week 51: The Missing Piece

What's New?

Returning home is the most difficult part of long-distance hiking; 

you have grown outside the puzzle and your piece no longer fits.

-Cindy Ross, explorer/author

In Week 51, we welcomed home our other third from a long journey. We give thanks for his safe return, first and foremost. But at the end of this year's story, the real take-home message is that no one will ever know the love that this man has for his Country better than Henry and I. He would freely give of himself and of his gifts to give others a safe passage, and I, selfishly, would hoard him in my mountain cave, if it were up to me. Thanks be to God, it is not.

We have all "grown outside of our puzzle", and truth be told, we have no desire to fit there anyway :) Week 51 was less about trying new things and more about letting it all go. Our brains are decompressing, and our hands are holding tight to one another. We wake up each morning knowing that we are all present and accounted for, and that we do not have to endure yet another day of trying to fill the missing piece with duct tape and super glue. 

Thanks to all of you who supported us on this journey. You will never know how much you are appreciated or necessary.   

Week 48: Brr! It's Cold Outside!

New 3-year old. I find myself constantly praying for this boy. He has such a quiet nature about him, and a dry sense of humor. Terrible eater. BEST laugh I have ever heard. Loves to hold hands on the couch and do puzzles on the floor and have random dance parties. With all of my heart, I love him.

 

 

New crochet whimsey: Free-hand snowflakes. Easy and fun to make!

New breakfast: adding 1 TBS of olive oil to my oats or cream of wheat. Got this idea from Giada Delaurentiis, and it is sooo yummy in this electric-dry, Kansas cold.

New children's fiction (for b-day): Bang! Boom! Roar! and Waking Dragons. Both books are so cute, and once again, Momma has grabbed a Jane Yolen goodie in Waking Dragons, a story about a little boy whose job it is to wake up the dragons and get them ready for school (he brushes their teeth, feeds them, it is very sweet.). "Bang-Bang Rwraaaaar!!!!" as Henry calls it, is the clear winner of the entire year of new children's fiction. We read this book 1,000 times per day. Dinosaurs + construction equipment + a little I-Spy + good morals. We highly recommend both of these!

,

(Not my photo: photo credit Simply Crochet) New project idea: This beautiful crochet garland (I would also like those gold drapes, the vanity, the vintage outfit, and the door, if that is possible)...

New beverage: German mulled wine. My neighbor introduced this to me, and it is quite tasty during a cold winter's happy hour :) I think I am sufficiently sick of it though. Kind of like egg nog, this will be a once-per year purchase. I'm just not a big sweet/flavory drinks person.

New (almost finished) crochet project: Summer baby blanket! This is 100%, American-made cotton, and there will be just a few, little lemon-yellow flowers decorating this as well. One of my sweet neighbors is having a baby girl next month, so my idea sprang from having a 6-month old in 108 degree, humid KS temps...

I also tried 2 new recipes this week. No photos have been included because they were both huge fails! One was a crockpot Thai chicken, which received great reviews on Food.com, but I just did not like it. Perhaps I was not in the mood for the peanut butter (I use Sunbutter), or maybe I added too much soy. It is always weird when I don't like a food of any kind, so beware! I also attempted to make a chocolate cream pie for Thanksgiving and burned the chocolate pudding. For the record, I am terrible at puddings and custards, but I LOVE to eat them. My Mom happens to be so talented at these types of yummies, and there is no way I can do the pudding from the box. My issue is that I always burn it. Do I need more patience? A double-boiler, perhaps? Less over-thinking? :) OR, maybe I should just stick to making what I don't screw up: fruit pies (for which, I credit Southern Living and The Joy of Cooking for teaching me how to make a good pie crust and fruit pie filling).

Week 40: Tomatoes, Prayers, and a Love Story

Week 40 brought strep throat to Henry and I. He actually had it at the end of Week 39 and is over it already, whereas I am just now in the thick of it. Thus, Week 40 was spent mostly on the couch, usually cuddling, and frequently watching television. Not being able to talk to my son has been difficult, and I have been in excruciating pain. I wonder if he was in this much pain, or if my adult body is just no comparison to his amazing pre-school aged one? Do any of us truly realize how amazing kids of this age are until we become stewards of them? The other night, during our bedtime prayers, he thanked God for "falling down, getting up, and for kisses and for stars...". I have no idea where that came from except that earlier that day, he tripped and fell while we were outside, playing. What a beautiful prayer just for life in general. Orated by a 3-year old.

Newness for Week 40: 

• Henry has read all of his books to me. I had no idea he had that many books completely memorized. 

• We have officially moved the puzzle station to the dining room table, which we rarely use anyway.

• I watched an entire movie from beginning to end in one sitting that wasn't made by Pixar: Les Miserables. I have never seen this - Any version! Weird, right? What a story of true love, from beginning to end. I don't think a greater love story has ever existed.

• Tried a yummy new smoothie recipe from Green Smoothie Revolution (Victoria Boutenko's recipe): 1 bunch dandelion greens + 4 Roma tomatoes (I used 3 vine tomatoes since that's what was in my fridge) + 3 cups water. This was good. I also added garlic since I'm sick, so it ended up being like a room temperature soup. As weird as it sounds, it was extremely satisfying. And besides Cream of Wheat and canned peaches, the only thing that tastes good. 

Week 39: Let's Celebrate 75% Completion!

What's new?

In Week 39, we celebrate a milestone: 75% of the way through the year! And just because we can, we will give thanks for all of it: our successes, our failures, our dreams, and our realities. My favorite ways to celebrate just about anything include eating food, chatting with friends and family, wearing a good pair of jeans, being outside, and making lists. 

Non-mom-jeans. The last time I bought a pair of hot jeans (the really good kind) was 2006. I didn't even buy any after I lost weight! Desperately needing to channel Linda Hamilton in the Terminator (and not owning a gymnists body or a machine gun or a cigarette), I got a new pair of Joe's. And it worked. I look exactly like the photo above. 

September foodie penpal. My second foodie penpal (check out The Lean Green Bean for an explanation of foodie penpals) package was full of deliciously sweet and energy-filled treats. Brookside acai chocolates are delicious! I love dark chocolate and was quite excited to discover that these were chewy. I LOVE chewy candies. I also had no idea Brookside was owned by Hershey. Way to go, Hershey. Henry and I love the honey sticks, which he had never had, and honey is a completely underestimated, natural anti-bacterial and anti-viral food. Agave nectar has nothing on honey, as much as it tries. I had had the Sweet Leaf mint green tea before, but was pleasantly surprised by my foodie penpal's ballsiness to include a glass jar of liquid in my package. Maybe my Linda Hamilton alter ego will give me the strength I need to be that brave in my future packages :) The homemade cookies were a sweet touch - Ted would have devoured these, being that they were peanut butter and chocolate, had he been here! I love orzo and fruit leather for running fuel - Orzo always makes for a nice, chilled pasta salad. Throw in some feta, cucumber, and tomato...maybe a little olive oil, and you have a delicious meal. My penpal also included special treats for Henry, which I thought was the sweetest thing ever.

Squaw Creek National Wildlife Refuge (Mound City, MO). This is an hour and a half north from Fort Leavenworth and completely worth every speck of your time. What a perfect time of year as well being the fall migration! There is a 10-mile loop around the refuge that is basically a driving tour (slow) with lots of places to get out with the spotting scope or camera, or just sit in your car with binos. We enjoyed seeing American white pelicans, osprey, turkey vultures, snow geese, loons, turtles, and lots of monarchs everywhere. We will definitely be back this winter to try to spot some bald eagles! 

Used food dehydrator. We can't wait to make some homemade teas and dried fruits. I may or may not include a specimen or two as well :)

If you will recall, at the Halfway Point, I created this list of goodies for completion to have done before the end of the year:

Here is what we have completed:

• ditch the sippy cup/switch to full big-boy cups only - done, for the most part. Cups with a lid are still nice for taking on runs, hikes, and in the car, kind of like a Nalgene.

• Pass the Praxis - by the Grace of God, I did pretty well on this crazy test!

• finish current book - yes 

• make it through a playgroup session without trying to leave the building barely, but yes

• successfully find a preschool in VA before we move there - yes, though I am not head-over-heels in love with it, as compared to how I feel about his current school/teacher

• pick peaches from local orchard and freeze enough pie fillings for peach pie until the end of the year They didn't open for u-Pick this year, but I was a farmer's market stalker, and have peaches galore. 

• take Henry owling and to a local owl lecture at a nearby nature center while he is still obsessed with owls - We did go owling! However, we did not make it to a lecture because they were all late in the evening (bedtime) rather than what I was hoping for (a couple that were in the early morning). Both are good times to go owling. He is still loving learning about owls, who fascinate us both.

• get a cute grow chart for Henry's room - done! He's growing like a weed.

• start preschool - yes

• not sit in the parking lot and cry for 3 hours on the first day of preschool like a total loser - yes, thanks to a very good friend

• seriously. get a life - I still have anxiety leaving him every single time. But it goes away within about 12 seconds after dropping him off :)

• say "please" and "thank you" consistently - He has started doing this! I am so proud. This was really the only thing I cared about on this list, and it happened. I've noticed he is better at saying please and thank you to strangers than he is to his Momma, however :) I am probably the same way with my Momma...

• squaw creek national wildlife refuge

Here is what is in the process of being completed:

• potty training completion - If you could graph this progress, it would look like a wave. Just within the last few days, he has been telling me "help"; grabbing himself; then holding it for a few seconds, which is awesome. He only does this in cotton undies - Pullups are a joke in case anyone reading this is just about to start this adventure.

• KS/MO bug collection - Just have to finish and affix my labels! Would like to get a couple more species.

• finish current crochet project and complete about 5 more - I don't know about the "5 more", but should be finished with the current behemoth in a month or so

• finish the rest of current book pile...about 8-9 of them, not counting the teacher resources now on my list - Probably more like 4.

• finish writing current short work of fiction - I think this will actually happen. As usual, It needs to be simplified a LOT for a short story.

• call my grandparents more regularly - Trying...My limited phone talking time is usually spent calling one of my parents, siblings, or sister-in-laws, so I really, sadly, have to schedule time to call anyone else, including friends. Though, is it really that sad? It gets done that way. Just life, I think.

• learn new tree identification (list) - Sucking it up on this one. But I have learned a few...

• try one new smoothie week per week - More like, every 2 weeks :) But yes.

• teach my son to catch and throw a football - working on it! He has a good arm, though teaching someone to catch is HARD when you suck yourself :) haha

• teach my son to ride his bike - Well, we are getting on, being pushed, and are fascinated by big kids on their bikes. Working on it...

• find a place to live in VA - Working on it. I think my Husband has much more lavish taste than I do, but I have always known this. I like cozy. He likes an echo :)

• get my child to willingly eat a vegetable/food in general - If green smoothies count, then yes.

• complete a half marathon on Post before we leave - One more week! Yay.

• make sure he can recognize his name (written) before he gets to his first day of preschool - I think he can recognize his name...He knows the spelling. not 100% sure if he really knows it or has just memorized it :)

Week 36: The Kindness of People, The Mush of My Brain

What's new?

Week 36 was a pretty great week, all around. That said, today was a tough one in a day-in-the-solo-life with my growing, glowing, almost-3-year-old. My brain is mush. I cannot even fake my way through this post with an attempt at some humor or ultra-fake-facebook-sounding BS about how we should all appreciate this time because it goes by so quickly. You know what? Right now, in this moment, I am proud to say that I do not appreciate it, and I can't wait until I no longer have to repeat, "please use your words, mommy can't understand you when you whine," 5,000 times a day. THERE. I said it. GASP. Now go find some sugary little Instagram quote to help you feel better. No wait. I already did that :) Don't worry, it is possible that I will delete this horridly grouchmo post and re-post a new, cheerful one when I wake up in the morning...Namaste, friends.

Week 36 Newness:

• The Sweetest Gift - A friend of a friend, whom we met ONCE, made Henry the most beautiful, random, adorable dinosaur quilt. I was so overwhelmingly blessed by this kind gesture, and Henry loved it so much that he danced on it and rolled around on it for days. Some people are so talented in this world! I love homemade.

• New Restaurants - As I mentioned last week, my Father-in-Law was here visiting. The man loves and appreciates food as much as I do (he did not pass this on to his son or to his grandson, which is probably good, or I would weigh 400 lbs, easy). We ate out a LOT and enjoyed every moment! Two new local places we tried were Osaka Sushi in Leavenworth (just outside of the main gate), and Panchos in Parkville, MO. I am so sad that I waited 1.5 years to try Osaka. See what being a food snob gets you? Nothing. It was delicious, and though I do not recommend eating there (kind of ghetto), the food was amazing, and it will be on the take-out menu often. Panchos was so fun! An old house, situated between a boxcar and a caboose. The food was good-enough-Mexican food. Having lived in San Diego, I am kind of still a Mexican food snob, but it was good! Well worth the trip, and if you have a kid who is obsessed with trains, it is a must. You get to sit inside of a traincar with a view of the real train that runs through Parkville. I heart Parkville.

• Friend Dating - While I am sure they are never going to call us back (today, the horrible, no-good, very bad day of which I spoke earlier, was our date day), I enjoyed spending some time with a very interesting, nice, patient woman and her sweet son from Henry's preschool, today. This woman was a good sport. Sooo kind. That is all.

• New Pet - Remember the little teddy bear hamster that we babysat for 6 weeks back in June/July? Well it turns out the parents of the little girl who owned him were looking to re-home this little critter, and we just fell in love with it. The little girl who previously owned him named him "Leah" and her mom suggested we change his name :) But Henry already knows "Leah" and thinks every animal slightly resembling a rodent is "like Leah", so, "Leah" stays. Him-Her.

Week 35: New Favorites

What's new?

Patee House Museum in St Joseph, MO is AMAZING! I took my 2.5-year old and my Father-in-Law, and all 3 of us gave this place 5/5 stars. It is a 40 minute drive from Fort Leavenworth, and, should you find yourself in the area, I highly recommend you do not wait 1.5 years to visit! We will, most definitely, be returning. My Father-in-Law and I both agreed that this museum is just as well-done as the American History Museum in D.C. Beautiful historical displays, and SO many of them. We could have stayed for hours! 

From the website:

 "Patee House Museum features two full floors of exhibits. Inside Patee House, you can climb aboard an 1860 train and ride the vintage "Wild Thing" carousel. The museum also houses an 1877 railroad depot, stagecoach, cars, trucks, fire trucks, wagons, buggies and carriages, Jeeps, a racecar, horse-drawn hearses and a real gallows, a blacksmith shop, dressmaker's shop, model railroads, antique furniture and toys, a wing with Western art by artist George Warfel, and a wing designed to look like the Streets of Old St. Jo in the 1860s-1880s."

Week 35 brought with it some fantastic newness, in addition to our visit to this historical treasure. You all know how I am a hard sell on new favorites? Well, this week I discovered quite a few! My Father-in-Law has been here visiting for a couple of weeks, so we are in vacation mode, which always helps.

• New favorite hair place: Jabez, located in Leavenworth. Ask for Marley. NO one knows about this place because everyone on Post goes to either Tom and Ann's or Teri's Hair Loft. I strongly recommend you give Jabez a try before they discover how awesome they are and raise their prices!

• The O'Malley sandwich at Weston Brewery in Weston, MO. It is basically the most amazing Reuben you will ever eat. In your life. Even better than my Mom's (never thought I'd say that). Mom, if you are reading this, I am SO sorry I did not take you here when you came to visit. I will get the recipe. All I know is, they use some kind of stone ground, spicy, sweet mustard sauce instead of horseradish or 1000 Island (which is gross and not a real Reuben but that's how everyone makes them). 

• I tried out Harbor Lights Coffeehouse in downtown Leavenworth. I cannot remember the last time I went to a coffeeshop by myself. It was phenomenal (not the coffee, the freedom). Coffee was okay. Menu looked yummy, and the place seemed very family-friendly. I'll go again, just because I can :)

• Henry...What a boy, this one :) He is growing so fast and changing at such an incredible rate these days. We seem to be moving out of a VERY frustrating phase and into another fun one :) The reason is because he is expressing himself and actually conversing. I love picking him up from school and hearing about his day. I love it that he can tell me little things now, like if he is cold or wants to go home or wants more food?! His nighttime prayers have also been very lengthy and detailed, of late. I adore listening to what he is thankful for. It is my new favorite part of the day. God Bless preschool teachers. 

Week 33: Holding Hands, Hot Air Balloons, and Baggy Clothes Wearing

What's new?

In Week 33, my sweetest little buddy had his first day of preschool! I wonder if he heard how loudly my heart beat against my chest when I dropped him off that morning? Knowing he was in the best of hands for a few hours, I treated myself to a little visit to Michael's to look at yarn and all of the fall/harvest decor without a little person in tow! A glorious time, my friends. One of my very sweet girlfriends let me drag her along as well, so bonus for some uninterrupted, adult conversation :) I have SO many solo momma plans...trail runs, return to writing fiction, local Victorian mansion/museums, the little kitchen store in town...Maybe some solo birdwatching? It's all dangerous. I'm not even sure where to start.   

Is it weird that I feel fat when I am nervous? When I feel fat, I tend to wear super baggy clothes. So chances are, if you see me wearing super baggy clothes, I am nervous or anxious about something(s). Like test days, doctor visits, hospitals in general, loud crashes in the middle of the night, and taking my son to his first day of preschool :) Also, when I am nervous, I crave hot coffee and hot soup (just since you were dying to know that).

When I picked him up and his teacher brought him to the door, he came out wearing his backpack (I couldn't get him to put it on, so already I was happy that he was learning), carrying his little painting he did and so proud. He even let his teacher HOLD his HAND as he walked out the door. That alone filled me with such hope. Such glee. When he saw me, his little lip quivered and his eyes filled up with tears. I quickly changed the subject and told him I was proud of him and that he was such a big boy. His teacher said he cried a few random times but was really good - followed directions, waited his turn, etc. Then, as SOON as we started walking down the hall, he was telling me all about his day and what they did and was speaking quite excitedly about it all. And as we crossed the street, he let me hold his hand the whole way across without a meltdown. A Christmas miracle, folks.

Preschool, I love you.

What else?

Other Week 33 new stuff:

• New children's fiction: A Little Critter compilation with all different Little Critter stories than we currently have, as well as a couple of Little Golden Books. The Please and Thank You Book is full of cute rhymes having to do with social etiquette and good behavior, but oddly, has nothing about saying "please" or "thank you". Out of the 3, it is my favorite. Henry is Little Critter obsessed, and I am no longer allowed to read it to him (he reads it). 

• New bug! Our first katydid! I have never seen one in real life :) We found this one at the Ernie Miller Nature Center down in Olathe, KS, and we were pretty excited.

• Great Midwest Balloon Festival (Olathe, KS) - We woke up early to drive an hour down South to see the hot air balloons come in and try to make their target. It was really fun, and the weather was beautiful. I always love being surrounded by nerds of whatever the "thing" is. Hot air balloon nerds are awesome. They just follow the balloons around and photograph them, commenting on wind speed and direction and the balloon itself. Huh. Oh, and Henry loved this :)

• New hiking shoes! I had my old Merrells about 8 years; abused and used them, and figured it was about time to replace them. I never like new shoes, but it is important to take care of your feet when you are on them as much as I, or so my Husband always tells me :) Merrells are nice if you have really narrow feet with high arches, and I used them for work many years. Now I just wear them to preschooler-hike and chase after the youngling. 5/5 either way. 

Week 30: The Sweet and The Sour

What's new?

Good Morning, all! Posting a day early this week, as we are headed up to the great Pacific Northwest, where our hearts are rooted deep in the moss-covered forests and where the smells of smoking salmon and never-quite-dried-out soil permeate your entire identity. A welcome getaway, after Week 30 hit us like a ton of bricks with the Praxis for Middle Grade Science. I am pretty sure I will have to retake that test, having guessed on 70/93 questions that decided to be all graduate-level chemistry and one biology question. Most of the content was not what the study guide eluded to, so really, I have no idea what my plan will be for the retake. I will know my score in 10-30 days, but I really am not being humble when I say that I don't even want to look. You know it is bad when you are praying for physics questions. Just please let there be a physics question. Or an earthquake. Or please let this be just a bad dream that I get to wake up from so I can start over. Yep. So that's that. And guess what? There are no start-overs in big kid world. You just have to keep moving forward. Breathe. Eat jars of salsa. Catch bugs with son. Lay in the grass. Sigh heavily. Watch the sun set. It won't look so bad in the morning, right? :) 

"What lies behind us and what lies ahead of us are tiny matters compared to what lives within us."
Henry David Thoreau

Thankfully, aside from that experience, Week 30 brought to Kansas, for the first time ever, my Mom (and Henry's Amma). Henry and I were so happy that she could spend some quality time here, and her presence was such a comfort to me. 

Speaking of comfort, here is a deliciously-sweet comfort food recipe that we tried and loved this week, straight from my Goosberry Patch 101 Homestyle Favorites cookbook. The original recipe was submitted by Sandie Pfeiffer, but I made a couple of slight modifications that made my Mom and I want to eat this for breakfast, lunch, and dinner:

Broccoli Cauliflower Salad
1 head of cauliflower
2 small bunches of broccoli
1 cup mayo
2 tbs sherry cooking wine
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 cup maple-cayenne pecans (my own recipe, but you could use any candied nut)
1/2 cup finely chopped raisins
6 slices crisp bacon, chopped

Mix mayo, sherry, and sugar together. Set aside. Combine everything else into a large bowl. Add dressing mixture; mix well, and chill before serving. The original recipe called for 1/2 cup of chopped red onion and plain pecans (not candied). It also had you use 1/2 the quantity of broccoli/cauliflower and 10 slices of bacon, rather than 6. I love mayonnaise and see absolutely nothing wrong with egg, canola oil, and vinegar, which comprise mayonnaise. You could use Vegannaise instead, or omit, entirely, and this would still be tasty. Also, the original recipe called for red wine vinegar, rather than cooking sherry.   

Other Week 30 newness:

• New children's fiction. Mom brought a new Jane Yolen book for Henry, which he loves. The artist is Kelly Murphy, and her little monsters are adorable and fun! Romping Monsters, Stomping Monsters is a sweet addition to our library.

• New art. Mom also brought some new art, and it is quirky and beautiful; cheery and complicated. It is by a Swedish artist done with a mixture of watercolor and pen and ink. Just what I needed! I am getting it framed right now but will include a photo as soon as I have it back.

• New wine. One of my girlfriends here on Post left a sweet and very thoughtful goodie bag on my doorstep on test day, and inside was a wine I had not previously tried: a Sweet Red (Woodbridge 2011). Has anyone had this? It was extremely sweet! Even more so than a Gewurztraminer. I would classify this as a light dessert wine, for sure. Mom thought it would be good with spicy barbeque or Thai food, and I concur.   

Week 29: Tomorrow is Test Day!

What's new?

Week 29!  AAAH! <---(real live action shot of my brain)

:)

Mom came in last night, and for this, I am truly grateful. There is something very calming and steady in the knowledge that she is here, and I can honestly, completely relax because I will not worry about Henry (or a babysitter flaking out at the last minute). If anything, he'll be in better hands than my own. Maybe I will come back tomorrow afternoon, and my Mom will have Henry potty-trained and eating his vegetables? She's kind of like the preschooler-whisperer, so who knows? And as for me, I may be 36, but I still need my mommy during the times I am a total spaz, like now!

I know that at this point, what will be will be, and there is no use worrying. I am not sure that I am worried...I am more excited; like that feeling the night before a marathon. You know you trained well. You know you did your best. You know, realistically, that you are probably not going to PR, but that you'll do well and finish strong. You know things can go wrong, but you also know that even if they do, it is going to be okay. I've run an entire marathon with Plantar fasciitis. This will be a lot easier, I am pretty sure :) Ohm's Law and divergent plate boundaries and refraction vs. diffraction!!!! You are so my bitch. I own you! :)

Week 29 was kind of pathetic in terms of trying new things, but here is some cool newness:

• We got a stonefly (Plecoptera) for our collection. I love them! Brings back memories of playing in the creek at our family's cabin in Northern Idaho...

• New bird book! Eastern Birds (Peterson Field Guide)...I have been surrounded by them for over a year now, and about to be for at least 4 more, so I was pretty excited about finding this used one on Amazon.

• Henry got a new set of John Deere farm toys. I never buy him actual toys. Books, yes, but not so much just for fun toys without any educational purpose. Daddy is much better than I am at getting those for fun things :) So for the first time ever, Henry said "thank you" to something other than juice or new library books. He also, for the first time ever, told me he "likes his new toys". Big Momma win :)

• Discovered a new Bible App (Tecarta). Do any of you Bible thumpers out there use a Bible App? I am not that techie, and I rarely get excited about things like Apps, but this one is neat because you can highlight and email scripture, make notes, "fold" pages, cross-reference stuff, etc. I really like having it on my iPhone and being able to send what I am reading to my Husband, across the World. It's the little things, sometimes...most times :)

Week 25: Look with your Eyes, See with your Heart.

What's new?

"Look with your eyes," is something that I say to my son quite often these days :) Though I mainly say it as a command synonymous to "don't touch that!" - it is something that he understands on a deeper level than most 2.5-year olds. He genuinely seems to enjoy looking "with his eyes", and we have the most fun together reading our Eye Spy books and looking for birds and bugs. In Week 25, I was much inspired to take Henry to his first art museum. We had a blast. He surprises and impresses me with his little brain, and more and more, I love hearing what he is thinking about, as he starts to verbally express himself (though not much...I think he might take after his Daddy just a bit in that department), I find that I just want to show him the World in the way that you want to show off for someone. I want to grab his hand and present him with all of this amazing beauty and life. 

Of course, my expectations were that we were, realistically, going to probably last all of 6 minutes before we were done (because he had to be in the stroller). Not so! He really seemed to enjoy looking at all of the paintings. We tried to play a larger version of "Eye Spy" books, and it worked. He also got a kick out of the sculptures and the sound of his voice as it echoed in each room :) Some of the docents came over and commented on how well he was doing and pointed out some more cool stuff to see. We ended our hour-long visit with a trip outside, which was just an extraordinary terraced lawn/landscape with even more sculptures. I highly recommend the Nelson-Atkins Museum of Art, should you find yourself in the area. It is free admission, and parking is only $5.

Other Week 25 Newness:

• I received the most beautiful book of watercolors of local landscapes called, Return to Kansas. The artist is J.R. Hamil, a local who worked for Hallmark Cards for 15 years before deciding to open his own studio in 1973. His wife, Sharon Hamil, was a teacher and writer of curriculum materials in Kansas. She wrote the accompanying historical text in the book, a really wonderful gift from my peeps that just moved away. I will treasure it, always.

• We are now hamster-sitting for 5 weeks for some neighbors who are on vacation. Henry is obsessed with this mangy little thing, and I will admit, it has grown on me. She follows me around in her little ball and just mostly wants to be held. She rolls in her poo and pee, and I try not to think about it too much because she really is pretty cute. Messy little creatures...

• Henry and I are learning our owl calls. He memorized all of the species of owls in my bird book and then kept asking me what they sounded like...uh...I knew 3? So, we have spent some time on YouTube and in the Ornithology Institute's library :) 

• I learned that milk thistle greens are edible.

• Tried a new green smoothie for the week: Kale, cucumber, granny smith apple, and banana (just a little bit to sweeten, otherwise it is very "green").   

• Conducted my first interviews of preschool potentials for Henry and found one whose director I think I may have a small woman crush on who JUST SO HAPPENS to be the teacher for the 2.5-year old class! I am so excited to have found a preschool that has a 2.5-year old class that is a perfect fit for us, and we meet next week for the tour! I think Henry is going to have the best time. 

Week 24: A Galaxy, A Smoothie, and A Toddler

what's new?

We spent week 24 in the company of our fabulous friends, the Morrows, who were staying with us for a week before they moved to their next Post. We have grown quite close over the last year, and I gave them my whole heart, and they gave me several solar systems, in return. Sometimes, when you allow yourself to be truly vulnerable in friendships, you get stung, but other times, you get a galaxy :) And so, there seems no other passage more befitting than One Art, by Elizabeth Bishop:

 The art of losing isn't hard to master;
 so many things seem filled with the intent
 to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

 Lose something every day.  Accept the fluster
 of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
 The art of losing isn't hard to master.

 Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
 places, and names, and where it was you meant
 to travel.  None of these will bring disaster.

 I lost my mother's watch.  And look! my last, or
 next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
 The art of losing isn't hard to master.

 I lost two cities, lovely ones.  And, vaster,
 some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
 I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.

 ---Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
 I love) I shan't have lied.  It's evident
 the art of losing's not too hard to master
 though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

New things we tried in Week 24:

• Scooter's Blend Coffee (a medium roast/blend). I liked it - very deeply roasted and nutty flavor overall. Still not better than my favorite, but better than many. An easy drinking coffee that you can get at the drive-thru in a pinch if you don't want to make a special grocery store trip just for coffee.

• New deployment book for kids - Lily Hates Goodbyes. This book received the utmost praise from critics and reviewers, buuuut...I was not a fan, simply for the reason that "Lily hates goodbyes" is repeated on almost every page, despite the creative and wonderful things she is doing throughout the story. I don't like the idea of harping on hating something and continuing to whine about it. Say it once, get over it, and move on. Tough baloney, Lily. C'mon. 

• Red Barn Farms Country Market (Weston, MO). I LOVE the town of Weston (about 20 minutes east of Fort Leavenworth), and though we have visited many of the local farms around here, have never made it to Red Barn! They have the cutest little country store - I highly recommend paying them a visit, should you venture out this way.

• The Farmhouse (Kansas City, MO). Beautiful farm-to-table restaurant downtown, near City Market. Our dear friends treated us to this great find, complete with lovely outdoor seating and delicious wine and appetizers before the beginnings of a toddler meltdown occurred (mine) and we said goodbye. It happens...We will be back. They have Black Butte Porter ON TAP :)  

• Green Smoothie Revolution (by, Victoria Boutenko). This book was given to to me to read by my neighbor, after chatting about rebuilding immunity from being sick/taking antibiotics. Her exact words were, "This book will rock your World.". I (wildly) concur and recommend to just about anyone. I learned quite a it about the overall digestion of green vegetables in general from this book. As a Colitis patient, I also learned some valuable tips for the absorption of the vitamins and minerals from veggies, but even if you learn nothing, this particular recipe feels really good on your tummy. I love parsley. It is highly underrated. We will alternate the types of greens we use (to avoid alkaloid absorption) every other week, but here is this week's smoothie recipe, which I modified (the original called for dates and only one lemon, and I prefer the piney-citrusy flavor of the parsley and didn't want it that sweet, so I opted for unsweetened berries):

2 cups parsley

1 Fuji apple (we used whatever)

1/2 cup frozen blueberry/raspberries

lemon juice from 2 squeezed lemons

a little bit of water to make my cheapo blender turn

This will be enough for a couple of days - make sure to store in glass, not plastic, which will leach nutrients

Week 21: Tornados, Tiger Tails, and Those We Love

What's New?

In Week 21, I received a phone call from my Dad asking if we were in our basement. No, I responded, we just got home from a run. Laughter. "There's a tornado watch in effect in your area," he explains. "Yes, Dad. I know. But we ran in between watches." Twenty minutes later, our power was out, and wind gusts were strong enough to throw our neighbors' yard trampolines across Post and to knock a person over. And those are just wind gusts. We experienced our first real tornado watch.

We are relatively prepared for minor things such as power outages in our area, and for this, I am thankful. Flashlights, candles, propane stove, blankets, changes of clothes and water/food/medicines...We would be okay for a few days. Residents of our area were told to watch the skies for hail and a "greenish" tint. Henry and I made hot cocoa and curled up in a blanket and sent texts back and forth to my Husband and Siblings/Parents. Henry was getting over a quick but nasty flu virus, and honestly, my worrying had been so great over that incident, that the tornado watch seemed somewhat insignificant in comparison. I just hugged him and smiled at his 2.5-year-old curiosity about what thunder and lightening and flashlights were. 

The next day, we turned on the news to hear and see the tragic outcome of the tornado in Moore, Oklahoma. Feelings of helplessness and grief washed over us all. As insignificant as it may be, here is the link to the Red Cross if anyone reading this feels lead to help out in a small way. 

Hug your loved ones, and maybe even your acquaintances, once in a while.    

Newness for Week 21:

• Tried out Weston Brewery on a momma's-only lunch date with a girlfriend. The Drop-Kick Ale (which I had never tried from there) was delicious, comparable to a nutty amber such as Fat Tire, but better. We enjoyed delicious burgers and spicy fries on the patio - I will definitely be returning! Very kid and family friendly, which is always a plus. 

• Tiger Tail Rolling Muscle Massager! WHY is this just now in my house?! A-MAZING. I have been rolling it over my feet, my ridiculously tight IT bands, and my hip flexors. I basically just want to marry it. 

• Discovery of a great new blog: Silly Eagle Books. The author of this blog is a friend of a dear friend, who recommended this site to me. She reviews children's fiction and discusses related projects that she does with her kids, who are home-schooled. It is not a cheesy crafting site where they paint egg cartons and glue googly eyes onto toilet paper rolls! It is very legit with some meat on its bones, if you know what I'm getting at :) Check it out! You will love it even if you don't have children!

• Guess who came home (for a whole week!) during Week 21?! Our Other Third!! We are sooo excited. We have missed him greatly these past couple of weeks.  

Week 20: I Wish to Live Deliberately

What's new?

"I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practice resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms, and, if it proved to be mean, why then to get the whole and genuine meanness of it, and publish its meanness to the world; or if it were sublime, to know it by experience, and be able to give a true account of it in my next excursion." 

- Henry David Thoreau

I'll admit, in Week 20, we did not try many new things! However, I was one busy momma, and I started off the week by taking a 4-hour reading and writing test for the State of Virginia Department of Education. Blech! I have not taken a test like that since the SAT/ACTs in high school, and my DayQuil-infused brain was in sprint mode, trying to take this test. Thankfully, I passed with flying colors. Though I am a nervous test-taker, I can squeak out essays and edit technical excerpts pretty well, when it matters. As much as I poo-pooed this test, my Husband was really sweet and supportive about it, pointing out that it was necessary to celebrate small wins. I know he tells that to his crew probably daily. You'd think that would work on his Wife :) The take-home lesson for me from this test is that I need to focus on relaxation and on getting better sleep for "the big test" in July. It is hard for me to relax and stay on task, concurrently. I am usually more productive if under a wee bit of stress. Thus, I am usually always a wee bit stressed :) haha

I think it is nice knowing that God gave me the tools to be able to move forward with my goals and not be stunted by failure or even just fear of failure. I feel blessed that my parents raised me to "live deliberately" and expect to have to work hard for things in life. There are a lot of people out there who just expect everything to be handed to them or to live without failure, and they never MOVE forward. If writing fiction has taught me anything, it is not to be afraid of failure or of what people think of you. And the great scientific minds whose creativity and curiosity drove them to fail and discover the basic truths which I am hopefully going to be teaching to our young people? Their failures are just as big of an inspiration to me than their successes. 

Week 20 newness:

• Ted and I "celebrated" our 4th wedding anniversary. He celebrated by being Underway with 85 sailors, and I celebrated by studying for my Praxis exam while Henry napped and having sushi with a friend. We plan on for-real celebrating when he comes home for a week at the end of this month! 

• The only real new thing I tried this week was Bean Blossom Blueberry Hard Cider, and that is because Meghan gave it to me, not because I took the initiative to actually try something new on my own. I was not a huge fan of this, but I think I was expecting something more like a Hornsbys. It was more like a sparkling wine infused with blueberry flavor. After a few sips, I poured it over ice, which helped a lot. Well, then I read the can label, and it says right on the can "apple wine". So, maybe I just don't know what real cider tastes like? :) In any case, it's my "something new".

Week 19: A Flavor Explosion

What's New?

Week 19 was cut a little short by a nasty momma flu virus (ew!). Damn, I really need to stop licking the carts at Walmart :) Luckily, we started the week out with a bang and didn't lose any time in trying new things despite the midweek bump in the road. We were also able to get in some fantastic toddler bird-watching, and my kid is so into it! I never expected that he would be at all, but he is really good at remembering the names of things and at spotting critters. I will probably cry when he gets his first pair of binoculars. And he will think I am nuts. And that will be us for the rest of our lives together. That is all.

So, yes. I tried a new coffee, which is one I bought from the Coffeehouse at City Market in Kansas City the previous week, along with my loads of black jelly beans. It was bright, spicy, and a little green...they would hate me for saying this, but it reminded me of Starbuck's coffee. A lot of folks LOVE that, but I am going to stick with my Pete's Major Dickensen's blend, thank you very much. All time favorite is still Caffe Vita from Seattle, or Tully's, if I am near one somewhere on the West Coast. I'll try anything twice, but am a tough sell on replacing my true favorites (again, a reason this blog exists)!

A friend down the street surprised me with a jar of her homemade pineapple salsa. Since chips and salsa are a staple item (one of the 4 food groups, actually) in this household, and I have a salsa addiction, I was excited. I had never tried a tomato-based pineapple salsa before, and I have to say, I liked it! It was definitely different, and I ate the entire jar in 2 days, so I guess different is good :) I think this would be amazing on grilled tilapia, or mixed with rice and beans. A nice change of pace from a lot of cilantro.

Josh Cabernet (Vintage 2011) was actually something I tried a few weeks back, but I somehow forgot to mention it. This was a recommendation by a friend whose palate I trust more than just about anyone else's. I love how winemakers describe their wines as "approachable". What does that even mean? Have you ever met an unapproachable wine? C'mon. Yet Josh is one that I have approached several times already and loved it each time. I always love a confident cab with a soft finish that doesn't overpower everything. I think that's what "approachable" must mean :)

New Henry Stuff for Week 19:

• First time he reached up and held my hand while we were out walking. He even said, "holding momma's hand" and looked up at smiled at me :) MELT. Of course, on another occasion out walking, I reached down to grab his hand as we were crossing an intersection, and he had a complete meltdown the whole rest of the way home...

• Got our first library card! This boy loves his books, and we go through them pretty quickly now. Even with eBaying, a children's book habit (or an adult one, ahem, my HUSBAND) can spiral out of control REAL fast. The library (L-I-B-R-A-R-Y) is loads of fun :) xoxo

Week 16: Craving Comfort and Navigating Toddler Independence

Week 16 brought with it a new level of stress (can that be considered something "new"?) when I began to realize that there is no way humanly possible that I can cram all of the needed test information from every field of science into my brain before July 20. Middle Grade science teachers, I cannot believe you had to take this test! It is insane. I feel like it would be easier if I just took the one for High School biology and said to heck with it! Alas, I cannot. I am determined that I can somehow pass this. Come on, brain, you can do it (insert sound of creaky stairs, here)! :) In any case, Week 16 was all about craving comfort, be it comfort foods, comfortable clothes, yummy smells (with the exception of the downstairs pee-pee bathroom/Henry's office), good friends, good wine, hot tea, and Lego city parties.

I'll be the first one to admit that when it comes to comfort, I don't like new things. I love my rut and my old standbys. Stress comes, and I am like a donkey in mud when it comes to trying new things. That was one of the main reasons I began this blog - To force myself out of the rut I knew would come :) Having a 2-year old helps a lot with that because you start seeing the World through their eyes, which see everything new. Then, you become inspired to keep trying. Having friends also helps with that because when you don't feel like being adventurous, they are there to at least make you try a new food or suggest a new way of doing something. 

This week, my very dear friends across the street brought Henry and I an extremely good, new comfort food: Corn Chowder with Roasted Tomatillos and Poblano. I think they actually roasted the corn too, which was amazing. It is vegan, gluten-free, and soooo good with crusty bread and of course, a frothy ale.

Other Week 16 Newness:

• Overland Park Farmer's Market: The City of Overland Park is about an hour away from Fort Leavenworth. We went on opening day of the Market, so not all of the vendors from the list were there, but it was good! We walked away with carrot oatmeal raisin cookies, fresh olive oil rosemary bread, and farm-fresh eggs! I am looking forward to going again.

• First Dentist Appointment: As traumatized as Henry was (he screamed bloody murder the entire visit), he now blesses "the dentist" in our nightly prayers :) After that experience, so do I.

• Down the Stairs: Apparently, Henry has decided to start walking down the stairs front-facing, like a big boy. The first time I saw him do this, my heart leaped out of my mouth and onto the floor, but he made it the whole way, and then exclaimed, "all by myself!!" complete with one giant, sweet grin :) 

• New Running Partner: Our first running date went well! I love it when people say they don't usually talk when they run and then talk the entire run :) Or when they say they are slow and will probably have to walk and then you are sprinting to catch up with them. This new one, she's a high-energy character. I immediately liked her (before we even ran) because she was ready 15 minutes early. 

Week 15: Pure Goodness

In Week 15, my 2-1/3 year-old said bye-bye to his binky forever (pacifier). He still had been using it for naps and nighttime, but one day, it went to the play with Bambi, and it started to rain. Since binky doesn't like getting wet, he just stayed with Bambi and Thumper, warm and dry. We'll probably see him again, but he's decided to stay for a while :) In the meantime, Binky has been replaced with bedtime stories, which seemed to be a pretty smooth transition.

Other new goodness for Week 15:

• Poop on the Potty: We had several days in a row of him telling me he had to go, me listening, and then him going. We also had a couple of him not telling me until after he had gone, or him telling me and me not listening, or him telling me and then not going until I put his pullup back on. But progress!!

• Roasting sticks: Our amazing friends who happen to live across the street came over for dinner and brought one of the best presents, ever, and they had them handmade by prisoners! They are amazing and so well-crafted, and I have always wanted fancy roasting sticks! The memories I have of camping and roasting marshmallows with my family as a kid are not only some of my favorite; they have become somewhat sacred because they include my sister when she was still innocent - Long before the vicious cycle of addiction became her. It is amazing how you preserve the people you love. Everyone does it differently. In my preservation of her, we happen to be camping, and she has a face covered in sticky marshmallows and dirt.

• The BOB: I have been running with Henry for almost 2 years in the JEEP. The JEEP has served us well for $175. We have logged many, many miles, both on and off-road on that thing. But, after 6 miles the other day, we blew a flat. The following day, I borrowed our friends' BOB Revolution. It was like nothing I had ever experienced running with Henry. First of all, he was completely weightless (vs. the Jeep where it feels like I am pushing 50 lbs). Second, the shock absorption? OH MY GOSH: phenomenal. I felt nothing. And finally, the turning capabilities - This thing turns on a dime. Now, ideally, for running 5-6 miles, you would want a fixed wheel (and a 16" rather than the 12" front wheel), so after much research and emailing random marathoners, we decided to purchase the BOB SUS. Apparently, this model has even better shock absorption than the Revolution (which is insane to even imagine), and is truly off-road capable and durable. We found a pretty good deal (about $100 less than the sticker price) from a dealer on Amazon. Extremely excited! I honestly did not think that by this age, Henry would still like running with me! If anything, he likes it even more, and we are able to go longer distances, which is great! My sweet buddy bee. He has probably figured out that Momma is a lot less grouchy when she runs, haha.

• Lab Safety Procedures: I know you are all at the edge of your seats with the excitement of our lives right now, so you will be even more excited when I tell you that this week, I memorized the Lab Safety Procedures manual for teaching science labs to Jr High and High-schoolers. Someone gets HCl on their skin? I can handle that. A fire in the lab? No problemo. A funny smell? Evacuate. Oh yes. Your children will be safe with me. And they will map recessive alleles in fruit flies like there is no tomorrow.

• Five Guys Burgers and Fries: There is a first time for everything, but few are as memorable as this cheeseburger. Danger, danger, danger. Hands-down, best burger and fries I have ever had. Unbelievable.

Week 12: Precious Life

“It is nothing to die. It is frightful not to live.” 

-Victor Hugo, Les Miserables

In Week 12, we experienced many new things, among which was some very happy news! First, Ted and I found out that one of our very closest friends suffered from a bi pulmonary embolism comprised of several blood clots in the lungs. He originally thought he was having a heart attack because the symptoms were essentially the same, so he thankfully called 911 in time. This man is in his mid 30's, does not drink or eat junkfood, is a former gymnast, for goodness' sake, and does not otherwise fit the bill for this condition at all. I was obviously so happy to hear he was okay and well-taken care of, but the thought crossed my mind that, if this man had not made it, he would have lived a very full and purpose-driven life; one that he should be proud of. And the older and more grouchy and cantankerous I become, the more I realize that I don't want to be close to people who I am not truly proud of. Who has time? Vince, if you are reading this, Ted and I love you, and friend, we are damn proud of you.

How do you spend your numbered days? Are you proud of them? Do you think God is proud of them?

We also received the news that my baby brother (Brother #3) and his wife are expecting their first child! Could this be the 7th boy, or will we finally have a little girl in the family? I can't wait to find out! Will and Whitney are going to make excellent parents. 

Other new things to report for Week 12:

• I finished East of Eden and began a non-fiction (memoir): Reading Lolita in Tehran. I am inhaling every word like a crack addict. Not only does Nafasi write BEAUTIFULLY, but if ever words had meaning, this compilation is indeed a powerful source of it! Regarding East of Eden, I loved it and am so glad I read it, but I was not crazy about the way he ended it. I guess it had to end, sometime. Perhaps I just don't like endings.

• Henry and I went to the Crayola store in downtown Kansas City. It was so much fun! We got some new triangle crayons with 24 colors (not the huge, chunky box of 4 colors you see at the store). Henry loves it when I color pictures of the Thomas the Train characters. Luckily, trains are easy :) I am otherwise a terrible artist! One day, he'll realize that :)

• My 2-year old actually, willingly, tried a "new" fruit, ate the whole thing, and asked for more. This is HUGE because at 12 months old up until now, he started refusing any food with a slimy or wet texture. He has only willingly eaten bananas, raisins, and apple slices (but rarely apple slices). I continued to offer him fresh fruits (and veggies) the entire last year, which I am now glad of!

• Henry also has started sharing with me. He is NOT a good sharer at all, so this was awesome to see. And he shared his stickers, no less. Pretty big time :) He's getting so grown-up! 

• Okay, one more new Henry thing and I'll stop: Naps...He has started not taking one 1-2 days per week. On those days, he sleeps for like 11-12 straight hours and wakes up a very happy boy, so I don't mind (too much).